“And Enoch lived in intimacy with God. Then he disappeared because God took him. ” (Genesis 5:24).
The literal translation of this text is: “Enoch walked with God, and then he was gone, because God took him.” “… walked with God …” that’s right. But what does that actually mean to me?
Well, recently this short phrase has become the basis of my relationship with Jesus, because I discover the beauty of being constantly in His presence. It seems to be obvious for a nun, but I must honestly admit that it was not always like that for me. I mean, of course, the awareness of his constant presence, not on the basis of fear and the feeling of being trapped. On the contrary – on the basis of freedom and an awakened desire to “live abundantly”. This “walking with God” is characterized by simplicity of expression, simple gestures. For me, staying in His presence means, for example, not dividing my time during the day into pieces such as: now it’s time for work, now for prayer, and now “for myself”, etc. If my life were to be cut, I risked that I would not want to invite Him everywhere … Because I find that some part of my world is not “holy” enough to accept His presence. But it is He who sanctifies with His PRESENCE. And I don’t want to share this anymore. And most of all, I am aware that He does not want it. He, on the other hand, wants to share every time with me… literally.
On this occasion, I will reveal my, maybe a little funny, habit of drinking tea. When the circumstance causes me to do it myself (which I generally dislike), I put two mugs on top and invite Jesus. Sometimes we drink in silence, but most of the time He just listens… and that’s enough. It may be strange or banal, but such a gesture helps me a lot to remind myself that time belongs to Him. And if I would spare 15 minutes for Him now over a cup of tea, what will I do with Him for all eternity?
The feeling of being constantly before God’s face helps when temptations come. It is easier and faster to reflect then and ask Jesus: “Do you like what I did?”
“Walking with God” is also the basis of a mindful and simple life, living in the present. If I walk “by the hand” with God, I am focused on the signs of His presence in my life, in the world around me. Then I don’t need a lot of things, experiences, crowds of people around me. On the contrary – I can “settle for little”, because I have HIM with me… so I have everything (I do not try to feed myself with just anything when I have SENS with me). And I live in the present, because God is in it (not in dwelling on the past and not in worrying about tomorrow).
Every now and then I ask myself a question that verifies and sets me up spiritually: do you see that my heart is really already occupied? (i.e. am I really the bride? Is it known that I am already “walking” with Someone? Is there a recognizable sign of being a “woman of God” in me apart from my habit?). My answers are painful, but they help us return to the trodden path with Him.
“By faith Enoch was taken away so that he would not see death, and he was not found because God had taken him. Before he was taken away, however, he received a testimony that he was pleasing to God. ” (Hebrews 11: 5)
Oh, how much I would like to receive such a testimony from God …
Sr. Franciszka Jarnot